


Waking the Dead

by Rian



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Death, F/M, M/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-23
Updated: 2014-09-23
Packaged: 2018-02-18 12:17:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2348192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rian/pseuds/Rian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Am I dying? Is that why you're here?"<br/>"Do you feel like you're dying?"<br/>Remus snorted. "A lot of the time, yes."<br/>"Well, you're not."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waking the Dead

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 2008 round of the Remus/Sirius Games on Livejournal. My prompt was the following: Taurus (April 21 — May 20): Like a garden that has endured a long winter, your leaves have shrivelled and your stems have withered. But with Venus now in your sign, your zest for life will return and inspire an old and nearly forgotten dream. A revival has begun.  
> Original livejournal post: http://rian219.livejournal.com/272367.html

~~~

Remus woke with a start, the ingrained habits of more dangerous times seeing him leaping to his feet and fumbling for his wand before he was properly awake. The book he'd been reading when he'd fallen asleep fell to the floor with a thud, and his neck and knees screamed in protest at his sudden movement. He winced, grunting in pain and raising a hand to rub the back of his neck. He really needed to stop falling asleep in armchairs when Tonks was on night shift.

The knock that had woken him came again, and he gripped his wand more tightly before moving to answer the door, still moving stiffly as his muscles stretched. The clock on the wall said three a.m..  
When he got to the door he didn't open it, tightening his hand around his wand again. Even now Voldemort was dead, you couldn't be too careful, and he had Teddy to protect. "Who is it?" he called, trying not to sound as if he'd just woken up.

"It's me, Remus. Harry. Kingsley's here too. Open the door."

Remus' stomach clenched, his hands shaking as he unlocked the door. Harry looked pale and like he'd been crying, and Kingsley's expression was grim. "What's happened?"

"Let's not do this on the doorstep, hmm?" Kingsley said and for a moment Remus wanted to punch him. He resisted – barely – and stood aside to let them in, ushering them into the living room and closing the door. The last thing he needed was for Teddy to wake up. Harry and Kingsley stood in the middle of the room, and Remus didn't urge them to sit or offer them a drink. His stomach was in knots. "Where is she? Is she dead?"

Harry looked pained, but Kingsley's voice was calm when he said, "Maybe you should sit down."

"I don't want to sit down!" He wasn't shouting, but he would be soon, and then he'd only have himself to blame if Teddy woke up. He controlled himself with an effort. "Just tell me, Kingsley. It's three a.m.; this is not a social visit. She's dead, isn't she?"

Kingsley hesitated for another moment, and it was Harry who spoke. "Yes," he said abruptly, then stopped and looked down, blinking rapidly before swallowing hard and looking up at Remus again. "It was…we got word of a group of Voldemort's supporters in Surrey, so we went to sort them out. There was fighting, and she got hit with a killing curse." He stopped again, sighed and went on. "It wasn't even meant for her, but it deflected off a window and hit her in the back." He sighed and scrubbed a hand through his hair, looking exhausted. "I tried to stop it, to shield her or something, but I was too far away. There was so much going on, and I…I just couldn't."

After Harry fell silent, no one spoke. The ticking of the clock on the wall was loud in the background. Remus counted a full sixty seconds before Kingsley opened his mouth to speak. Remus cut him off. "Where is she? I want to see her."

"Oh." Kingsley said, looking surprised. Remus wanted to punch him again. "Right. Of course. I'll…she's at the Ministry."

Remus nodded. "Okay then. Let's go."

"Ah…what about Teddy?"

"I'll stay with Teddy," Harry said.

Remus looked at Harry, then back at Kingsley. "Harry will stay with Teddy," he echoed. "Let's go."

~~~

Tonks looked serene, utterly at peace, which Remus supposed she was. She also looked unreal, and more like her mother in death than she'd ever looked in life, the black hair that was her family's legacy startling, after the years of pinks, purples and blues, against the paleness of her skin. Remus couldn't help wondering if this was the first time he'd seen Tonks for who she really was.

When Remus and Kingsley emerged from the morgue, Andromeda was coming in, followed by two Aurors who looked like they'd rather be anywhere else. Andromeda's eyes were red-rimmed and puffy, but she walked with a stiff-backed, haughty dignity that was common to all Blacks during times of crisis. As she passed him her gaze met his for a long moment, but neither of them stopped or said a word to each other. There was nothing to say, and Remus had to get back to his son.

He got rid of Harry and Kingsley the moment he got back to the house, and then went up to Teddy's room. The boy was still fast asleep, totally oblivious to the fact that his world had been irrevocably changed in the blink of an eye. Remus watched him for a moment, then stepped into the room, lying down on top of the blankets and curling around his son, tucking Teddy's head under his chin. For a moment he entertained pretending that the whole night had been some sort of bad dream, but he knew he wouldn't be able to maintain that for long. He'd danced this dance before, too many times to count, and knew all the steps off by heart.

~~~

The funeral and wake was a blur for Remus, but he made it through thanks to the consumption of more alcohol than he should have had, but less than he would have liked. The church was full to the brim with mourners, Andromeda's house overflowing with them. Everybody said it was a lovely funeral.

With the last guest seen off and Teddy safely tucked into bed in Andromeda's spare room, Remus girded his loins and started gathering plates and cups to take them into the kitchen. Andromeda was standing at the sink when he walked in, staring out of the window while a spell cleaned the dishes in the sink in front of her. She looked at Remus only when he stopped beside her.

"Just put those on the table, I'll get them in a minute. Where's Teddy?"

"In bed." Remus placed the dishes on the table. "He's had a big day."

"Mmm." Andromeda kept staring out of the window. "I think you should move in here."

"What?" Remus stared at her; she didn't turn to look at him. "Andromeda, I don't think…"

"It's the most sensible option, Remus." As the clean dishes started piling themselves into the dish drainer, Andromeda turned to retrieve the plates Remus had put on the table. "Dora's pension might keep you both in food and clothes, but only just, and what about his schooling? He's five, he needs to start lessons, and you're not going to be able to afford a tutor." She dumped the plates in the sink, and the dish cloth and brush that had been hovering in the air over the sink dived back into the water to start washing them. "There's room enough for you both here, and at least if you lived here with me you wouldn't have to get one; you could teach him yourself. You're the best teacher he could have. It would be a good thing for both of you."

Remus had been bristling at her words, at the implication that he wouldn't be able to provide for his son over and above the stipend the Ministry would pay him for being the widower of an Auror killed in the line of duty, but the compliment in the second part of her little speech, backhanded though it was, stopped him in his tracks. "Oh. Well, I…I wouldn't want to impose…"

Andromeda sighed. "Remus, you and Teddy are practically the only family I have left. Teddy's going to be my only grandchild. Just say yes, all right? For all our sakes."

Remus was silent a moment, then he nodded. "All right. I'll start packing up the house tomorrow."

"Good." Andromeda nodded. "That's good."

~~~

They moved in with Andromeda the week after Tonks' funeral, Teddy into a bedroom that had been newly decorated with everything a five year old boy could wish for. And if he cried for his mother when he woke in the night, he had both Remus and Andromeda to comfort him, to rock him and read him stories until he fell asleep. Remus busied himself with fortifying a shed in the garden for his monthly transformations, and then with Teddy's lesson plans, and he only drank himself into a stupor every night for the first six months. He thought that was pretty good, all things considered, and at least it meant he got some sleep.

But he and Teddy settled, gradually, into their new life. Six months turned into a year, two years, three, then six. The day Remus saw Teddy off on the Hogwarts Express for the first time was one of the proudest days of his life, but when he and Andromeda arrived home he couldn't help noticing how quiet the house was, and nothing he tried to occupy himself with eased the ache in his chest.

~~~

It started the very first moon after Teddy went to Hogwarts.

Remus was curled up in the middle of the floor of the shed he used for his transformations, breathing hard and screwing his eyes shut, grimacing at the ache in his bones. He tensed as the pain intensified, groaning a little under his breath as he started to crawl to the back of the shed, trying to get as far away from the door as possible. The pain got worse with every inch of ground he covered, and when he got to the back wall he collapsed against the floor, digging his nails into the wood before starting to writhe in pain, crying out again. Flipping over onto his back, his body preparing to rip itself apart and be remade, Remus opened his eyes to see an enormous black dog standing over him. It was the last thing he saw before the wolf took him.

Afterwards, in the peaceful dark just before dawn, Remus slept, stirring only once when he felt the warmth of another body press up against him, felt thick, soft fur underneath his palms and the gentle touch of a warm nose on his cheek, whiskers tickling his skin. Remus pressed closer, burying his face against fur that turned suddenly into warm skin and a body that was almost as familiar to him as his own, but which he hadn't held for more years than he cared to count. As he felt strong arms move to hold him close Remus took a hitching breath and tried to speak in a voice ragged from screaming.

"Sirius, I…how did…"

"Shh, Moony, not now. I've got you, all right? I've got you…"

Remus didn't want to be quiet; he had questions, lots of them, but Sirius was holding him tightly, and he was so warm, and Remus was so tired, his body still aching from the change. Exhaustion was tugging at him, dragging him under, and he couldn't resist it. He pressed his face into the crook of Sirius' neck and slept.

When he woke Sirius was gone and Harry was there, gathering him up in a blanket and carrying him into the house. He stayed quiet until Harry had helped him dress and was tucking him into bed.

"Harry, Sirius…he was there. As Padfoot. In the shed. Last night." Remus couldn't look at him, but out of the corner of his eye he saw Harry still, frowning.

"What?"

Remus sighed. "Padfoot was in the shed with me last night."

"Remus, that's…that's not possible. Sirius is dead."

Remus nodded. "I know."

"It couldn't have been him. Sirius is dead," Harry repeated. "It must have been…you must have been imagining it. Dreaming it."

Remus nodded. He never dreamed on the night of the moon. "Yes, I suppose I must have."

"You should get some sleep," Harry said, hesitating a moment before turning to the door. "You must be tired."

Remus nodded. "I am. Thanks, Harry."

Harry turned back to him when his hand was on the doorknob, and Remus did look at him then. He looked troubled. "It's nothing, Remus, don't worry about it."

It wasn't nothing, and they both knew it, but Remus only nodded. "Okay. See you later."

Harry nodded, and then he was gone. Over the next few days Remus was on tenterhooks, jumping at shadows that were always Sirius-shaped out of the corner of his eye, but were always just shadows when he turned to look at them properly. Over the next month he convinced himself that Harry had been right, that he'd been seeing things, or dreaming, and it wasn't Padfoot that he'd seen at all, wasn't Sirius that had taken him in his arms and soothed him to sleep. Still, when the next moon came his stomach was tied into knots that had nothing to do with the moon, and he wasn't entirely surprised when the last thing he saw before he changed was Padfoot padding out of the shadows to lie beside him. After that it was a regular thing; every full moon Padfoot would appear the moment before Remus changed, and Sirius would be there the moment Remus changed back, to lull him into a peaceful sleep before Harry came to get him. Remus started to look forward to full moons like he hadn't since he was a teenager, but he never mentioned Sirius' visits to anyone again, preferring to wrap that secret round him like a warm, familiar cloak.

~~~

The summer before Teddy's fifth year at Hogwarts was filled with talk of friends, girls (much to Remus' horror), and school. Two weeks before the holidays ended the book lists came, and something else for Teddy as well: a bright, shiny new Prefect's badge. Remus thought his heart would burst when he held it in his hand, Teddy having raced off to scrawl triumphant notes to his friends and find out who else had got one. Remus looked at it for the longest time, smoothing his thumb over its smooth surface before placing it down on the table next to Andromeda's elbow as she sat reading through the list of things they'd need to buy for the next school year. Remus had to swallow hard and clear his throat before he could speak.

"Prefect, hmm? That…says a lot about him."

Andromeda smiled slightly and picked up the badge, looking at it in silence for a moment before eventually saying, "Dora would be very proud."

Remus nodded. "Definitely." There was nothing else to say.

*

Two weeks later Remus hugged Teddy goodbye as platform nine and three-quarters bustled with activity around them, sure that his son had grown inches taller in the short time he'd been home. Teddy pulled away sooner than Remus would have liked, but Remus caught his wrist just as he stepped away, and pressed an envelope into Teddy's hand.

"Here, I…have this. Don't open it until you're in your dorm tonight."

Teddy raised his eyebrows, then looked down at the envelope in his hand. "Um, okay. What is it?"

Remus waved his hand. "Oh, it's just some things. Some things I thought you should have. Don't open it until later."

"Okay." Teddy still looked puzzled, but then his attention was caught by his friends shouting for him from a carriage door. "I've got to go, dad, all right? I'll see you later. Bye, Grandma!"

"All right," Remus said to Teddy's retreating back. "Bye." He turned to Andromeda. "Not that he's listening."

"He's fifteen. Of course he's not listening," Andromeda said dryly. "What was in the envelope?"

In the envelope was a large, folded piece of ancient parchment that had seen better days and many mischievous hands, a page of instructions and a photograph of four boys mugging for the camera. On the back of the photo was a date, over thirty years past, and their names; not the names their parents had given them but the ones they'd christened themselves with, in the spirit of friendship and love, in the days when they couldn't see far enough into the future to be frightened of it, and the world was just one long summer full of laughter and pranks.

Remus shrugged. "Oh, nothing really. Just some letters and photos, nothing that important. But I thought he might want them, that's all. Now he's old enough to appreciate them."

Andromeda nodded. She, out of anyone, knew the importance of keepsakes. "He'll like that, I'm sure."

"I hope so," Remus said, as the train started to pull away from the platform.

*

The day after Teddy left for Hogwarts Remus was sitting in the living room reading in front of the fire when the owl tapped on the window. He fed it a piece of toast left over from his breakfast and untied the note. It was very short.

Best present ever, MOONY!!!

TRL

Remus chuckled and went to find a piece of parchment. His reply was also short.

Do I need to tell you not to tell your grandmother? If you do, I will deny everything, and then I will disown you. Don't make me disown you, Teddy.

RJL, aka Moony, aka DAD

He sent it off, chuckling, and pretending that his heart wasn't aching for times gone by.

~~~

Teddy had been gone for two weeks when the ache in Remus' bones that told him of the approaching moon had him standing in the kitchen at three in the morning, waiting for the kettle to boil so he could have some tea with his firewhiskey. He stood in front of the open pantry for five minutes looking for something to eat, and when he turned around to lift the boiling kettle off the heat, Sirius was standing in the corner of the room, between the fridge and the kitchen door. Remus jumped six feet in the air, and almost dropped the container of biscuits he was carrying, only saving it from hitting the floor by whipping out his wand at the last second.

"Fuck, Sirius!" Remus snapped, clutching at his chest with his free hand as he floated the biscuits onto the kitchen table, his joints protesting his sudden movement. "You scared the hell out of me."

"Nice save. I always said you had good reflexes," Sirius said calmly.

Remus threw him a dirty look as he walked over to the kettle to take it off the burner. "What are you doing here?"

Sirius shrugged. "Nothing much."

"Nothing much." Remus shook his head and made tea, pouring a sizeable amount of firewhiskey into it. "Am I dreaming, or imagining you?"

"No."

"Am I dying? Is that why you're here?"

"Do you feel like you're dying?"

Remus snorted. "A lot of the time, yes."

"Well, you're not."

"Oh. Well I suppose that's good." Remus picked up his tea and stepped back, leaning against the bench opposite Sirius, looking at him properly for the first time. He looked good: younger, handsome like he'd been before Azkaban had ravaged him raw. Remus was suddenly conscious of what he must look like, and took a large swallow of his tea, coughing a little as it burned his throat. When he looked back up, Sirius was smiling. Remus frowned. "You're dead."

"I know."

"I got married after you died. To Tonks."

"I know. Didn't I always tell you she had a crush on you?"

Remus ignored that. "I had a kid with her."

"I know."

"Stop saying you know! If you know everything, then why are you here?"

Sirius shrugged again. "If you want me to go, I can go."

Remus ignored that as well. "Why didn't you show up before?"

"Before when?"

"Before now."

"You were busy before."

"Oh, and I'm not busy now?"

"Not as busy as you were before."

"Are you sure I'm not dying?"

"You're not dying, Moony."

Remus' heart clenched at that, and he shut his eyes. "I think…I need to go back to bed."

"Okay."

Remus opened his eyes. "You won't…you're going to be around later, right?"

Sirius nodded, and smiled again. "I'll be around, don't worry."

"Okay, well…" Remus put his tea down and pushed off from the bench. "Night, then."

Sirius didn't move. "Night."

Remus went to the doorway, but stopped before stepping through it. "I gave him the Map. Teddy, I mean. My son. He has it. I thought…I might as well. He'll get some use out of it."

Sirius nodded. "I'm sure he'll get plenty of use out of it."

"Yeah." Remus paused. "It probably wasn't the most responsible thing I could have done."

Sirius snorted. "The only people who think you're always responsible, Remus Lupin, are people that don't know you very well. It was a brilliant thing to do, and you're a good dad. Now go to bed."

Remus nodded. "Right. Okay."

Remus went up to bed slowly, half expecting Sirius to follow him up, but when he got there the room was empty. He lay awake a long time listening for footsteps, watching the darkness for shadows, but there were none. Sirius wasn't there when he woke up either, and Remus didn't see him that night, or the next night, or the night after that; in fact, outside of the nights of his transformation Remus wasn't to see Sirius for months, even years. He thought he did sometimes, and at times Remus thought he felt Sirius' presence in the room with him, but it was never like that night in the kitchen, with Sirius standing in front of him like he lived and breathed. Remus could barely hide his disappointment.

~~~

Teddy finished the last bite of his pudding, putting his spoon down carefully and clearing his throat. "I want to move out."

Remus stared at Teddy, his own spoonful of pudding halfway to his mouth. Behind him, he heard the dishes clattering into the sink as Andromeda dropped them. From the corner of his eye he saw her turn around, so he spoke before she could. "Where do you want to move to?"

"London." Teddy looked at him, his expression a mixture of apprehension and excitement. "Some of the lads are going to get a place, and they want me to go in with them."

"Some of the lads, hmm?" Remus finished his pudding and stood, taking his dishes to the sink. Andromeda, still standing next to the sink, looked very unhappy. Remus ignored her, turning around to face Teddy again. "How often would Victoire be there?"

Teddy flushed, and Remus had to suppress a smile. "Not often! She's still at school."

"Yes, she is. It's good that we all remember that." Remus sat back down. "I suppose you've thought about whether you can afford to pay your bills on what you earn from the Ministry?"

Teddy nodded. "I have, and I can. And I won't be training as an Auror for too much longer, and then I'll be getting more money."

"Right." Remus picked up the teapot and poured himself a cup, wishing that he could add some firewhiskey to it, but he knew that Andromeda would kill him if he did that in front of Teddy. "Well, I suppose I can't really say no then, can I?"

Remus didn't miss the, "Yes you bloody well can, Remus!" from behind him, but he was more concerned with laughing as Teddy exploded out of his chair and practically climbed over the table to hug him before running off to firecall his friends. He was still laughing when Andromeda whacked him over the head with the dishtowel that she held in her hands.

~~~

Remus had thought that with Teddy away at school so much anyway it wouldn't really be that different when he moved out, but it turned out that there was a yawning chasm between Teddy being at school and Teddy living somewhere else. A yawning chasm that meant that Remus couldn't sleep.

Remus wasn't entirely surprised to find Sirius in the kitchen when he finally gave in one night and got up to make tea. "I hope that you're not letting Andromeda see you. She's not exactly sleeping well either at the moment."

"Andy won't see me," Sirius said, slouching against the fridge. "But even if she did, she wouldn't care."

Remus put the kettle on, then turned to Sirius, one eyebrow raised. "She wouldn't wonder why you were here?"

"No. She'd know. She knew."

Remus frowned. "What do you mean, 'she knew'? About what?"

"About us."

"About us?" Remus stared at Sirius, dumbstruck, then pulled out a chair from the table so that he could sit down. "No wonder she doesn't like me."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Remus, of course she likes you, you've been living with her for thirteen years. Her and Ted, they were just…I'm sure they thought it was a bit too soon, that's all. After me. And probably inadvisable, given there was a war on."

"And that their daughter wanted to marry a werewolf."

"I didn't say that."

"No, neither did they, but I'm sure they were thinking it."

Sirius rolled his eyes again. "Good to see you're still the same, Moony."

The kettle started boiling; Remus got up to make the tea, and didn't reply. Once the tea was made he sat down again, looking out the kitchen widow. "I was a pretty crap husband."

"They were trying times."

"Yeah, but…I was crap over and above that." Remus sighed. "I didn't mean to be. And I did get better, that's something." He paused. "But I still hope I'm a better father than I was a husband."

"Of course you are. Teddy's a great kid."

Remus nodded. "Yeah, but…I don't know how much of that is me."

"More than you think."

Remus didn't reply to that either. He drank his tea in silence, and Sirius didn't speak. When Remus got to the bottom of his mug he sighed and said, "It's just really quiet in the house without him."

Sirius nodded. "But you'll get used to it. You always do."

~~~

They established a pattern that night, although Remus didn't know it and he couldn't have worked out what the pattern was even if he did. He no longer had to wait for the moons to see Sirius, and he started to look forward to those visits even more than he looked forward to the moons. It frustrated Remus to no end that he couldn't predict when Sirius was going to appear, but the times when he did more than made up for the times when he didn't. They talked about everything: the past, the present, even the future. Every moment of every occasion was carefully noted and filed away in Remus' memory so that he could tell Sirius about it later, as if telling Sirius every moment fixed those moments in Remus' mind as well, never to be forgotten. Teddy's graduation from the Auror Academy; Remus' dancing with each of Harry's kids at Teddy and Victoire's wedding, their little hands in his as they stood on his feet and let him shuffle them around the dance floor; the first time he held each of his grandchildren in his arms, and how he couldn't help but marvel at how little they all were every single time; his own surprise seventieth birthday bash, thrown by Teddy and Andromeda and attended by everyone that Remus knew and loved. Or, at least, everyone that was still alive.

~~~

Teddy, Victoire and the children came home with them after the party, looking to have a little quiet family time before bed. They set Remus up in an armchair next to the fire, a glass of firewhiskey on the table next to his elbow (he'd given up pretending to dilute it with tea once he'd turned sixty-five, pretty certain that he'd earned the right to drink whatever he bloody well pleased), and he promptly fell asleep, his two youngest grandchildren tucked one under each arm. He woke up when Teddy started lifting them off him.

Teddy smiled. "Bedtime."

Remus smiled back, raising an eyebrow. "For them, or for me?"

"For them and for you," Teddy said, handing the last child to Andromeda before helping Remus to his feet. "Come on."

"I really don't need you putting me to bed, young man. Cheeky upstart."

Teddy laughed. "I know you don't, but it's your birthday. I want to."

Remus rolled his eyes, but let Teddy lead him to his bedroom door. "I'll take it from here, thank you," he said firmly, opening his door. Before he stepped through it, he turned, pulling Teddy into a hug.

Teddy's laugh had a surprised tinge to it, but he hugged Remus back readily enough. "Good party?"

"Great party. The best." Remus tightened his arms for a moment, then let go. "Thank you." He cleared his throat. "So I'll see you tomorrow, for lunch?" The next day was Remus' actual birthday.

Teddy nodded. "Definitely." He leaned in and hugged Remus again. "Sleep well, Dad. And happy birthday."

"Good night, lad. See you tomorrow." Remus stepped over the threshold into his room and watched Teddy walk down the hallway before shutting his bedroom door and getting ready for bed.

*

When he woke up it was still dark, but he felt refreshed, like he'd been asleep for days. He rolled over to look at the clock, but never quite made it, because Sirius was sitting on the end of his bed.

"Hi," Remus said, hesitantly, because Sirius had never appeared in his bedroom before.

Sirius smiled like there was nothing wrong. "Hi. Happy birthday. Good party?"

Oh, so that was it. Remus relaxed. "Great party, thanks."

Sirius nodded. "Want to come for a walk?"

"Ah…I suppose." Remus looked out the window at the still-dark sky and hesitated again; he didn't cope with the cold so well anymore.

"It'll be fine, Moony, don't worry. We won't go far. Just into the garden."

"Okay," Remus said, getting up and putting some warm clothes on while Sirius sat on the bed and waited. When Remus was ready he turned back to Sirius. "Ready?"

Sirius nodded and gestured towards the door. "Lead the way."

Sirius followed him out of the house and into the garden, where Remus was surprised to find it not as cold as he thought it would be. It was still damp, though, and slippery, so Remus unconsciously put out his hand towards Sirius to steady himself as they walked across the grass, force of habit now that he wasn't so steady on his legs anymore. Sirius caught his hand as he reached out, his grip warm and solid. Startled, Remus stopped in his tracks, Sirius stopping beside him.

"Sirius, what…what is this?"

"What?"

"This, my…I can feel you. You're warm."

"Am I?"

"Yes, you are, and you're not…" Remus looked down at their joined hands, and it was then he got another shock, because his hand didn't look like the hand of a seventy year old. It looked like the hand of a twenty year old. "Sirius, I…am I dead?"

"Yes."

"What?!"

"Yes, Remus, you're dead." Sirius pointed toward Remus' bedroom window, that looked out into the garden. "Go and look."

Remus frowned, but did as he was told, keeping hold of Sirius' hand. As he walked he couldn't help but notice that he wasn't so unsteady on his feet anymore, and his joints and muscles didn't ache as much as they'd been aching lately. When he looked in his bedroom window he could see himself, his seventy-year-old self, still lying in bed, hands folded peacefully over his chest as if he were merely asleep.

"I'm dead!" he said, turning on Sirius again.

Sirius looked amused. "Yes, that's what I said. Why are you so surprised?"

"You said I wasn't dying!"

"You weren't then. But you were always going to eventually, Remus, just like everyone."

"I know that, I just…" Remus sighed. "So you really were here to collect me, then."

Sirius shook his head. "No, I really wasn't."

"You were too, you bloody liar! Because here you are, and there I am. Dead."

Sirius laughed. "For fuck's sake you're a stubborn bugger, Remus. Listen: I didn't turn up to collect you, Remus. I came here to make sure that I didn't have to collect you."

Remus frowned. "What?"

Sirius spelled it out. "I came here to make sure you stayed alive, Moony. Because you had a chance that none of the rest of us did. You had a chance to live a really good, really long life, and I wanted to make sure you did. I wanted to make sure you got everything that was coming to you, and so I came here and made sure of it. You lived a good, long life, you had kids, grandkids, a family, even a fucking surprise party with all your friends, and you died in your sleep as peaceful as could be. All right? "

Remus stared at him dumbly. "I…I don't know what to say."

Sirius rolled his eyes, smiled, and pulled Remus towards him with their joined hands. "Say thank you, you daft prick," he said, then put paid to Remus being able to do that by kissing him. That was real too, as hot and sweet and real as the feel of their joined hands, the feel of Sirius' free arm around his waist holding him close. When the kiss ended Sirius relaxed his hold, but Remus stayed close, looking into Sirius' eyes and smiling.

"How long have you been waiting to do that?"

Sirius laughed and hugged Remus tightly, hard enough to have squeezed all the breath from him if he'd been alive. "Too long. Are you ready to go?"

Remus looked towards his bedroom window again. "I suppose. Will Teddy…?"

"Teddy will be fine, Remus. Andy will find you, and she'll know how to handle him. Everyone will be fine."

Remus kept his gaze on his window for a few moments longer, then nodded, turning back to Sirius. "Okay. Let's go then."

Sirius grinned. "Let's."

~~~


End file.
